When I find me, I’ll find you too…

20140131_114944 (2)There are days when I just want to live from my heart. Doing this liberates me, and gives me the chance to really be me. I’m a bit too romantic by nature – forever seeking beauty and romance in every bit of my life, even if there is none. I discover it in that cool wisp of evening air, in the blooming of little flower-buds, in the descent of the countless raindrops, in the tinkling of wind chimes and in the chirping of birds. Being a die-hard romantic naturally gives me happiness, but even so, there are many times that sadness arrives uninvited. Romantic movies are bliss, for they give me a window to another, refreshing world, even if only for an hour or two. For that little while, I become the character and live their life. Imagination, after all, is my constant companion that keeps me going through the most boring times of my life.
I’ve learnt to not depend upon making others the reason for my happiness. I’ve learnt that I can be happy by just trying to find a piece of myself every now and then. I can find happiness in the small things I do. A painting I’ve made, a sapling I’ve planted, a new dish I’ve cooked or some words I have written – things which need not be masterpieces – are what delight me. I pat myself on the back, and even dance or sing to celebrate the fact that I have done something myself. I’ve found a few things about myself – I am a good person with an empathetic heart, I am a good listener, a good mother (or so my kids say :P), a caring friend, an artist at heart, a lover of nature, and few other things that I can be proud of. I’m still in search of more.
I often enjoy reading people. I believe that every individual is like a kaleidoscope, because no matter how different situations change and shape them, they are a beautiful sight to behold. I know one thing for certain; time never waits. Somehow, I also know that this is the most beautiful aspect of the concept time. I believe that  right until our last breaths, we are capable of beginning once again. Never stop building yourself and creating your life. I won’t. Dream, and take one step at a time towards it. Always keep walking. And most importantly, enjoy every step along the way. It’s your life, so don’t live to impress others, but to impress yourself.
Stay blessed! 🙂

  • Leena Prasad 🙂

Mayhem

Print media
conveying that
humanity has been lost
The words –
murder, rape, terrorism,
bomb blasts and calamities
more than any others
appear in ink
And even so,
stay put,
because
there’s always more to come
The television
switched on
projecting the same idea –
humanity has been lost
Only sitcoms remain
to transport us from reality
to a different world,
if only
momentarily
And social media
Oh yes!
Photographs everywhere
Big Colgate smiles
portraying the one emotion
reserved for camera lenses
Dirty politics
eating up the
core of a nation –
and of every nation
A flimsy show of power over others,
projecting, suppressing,
making the situation
depressing
A mere trace of humanity
is somehow enough
to overwhelm
but not without, ironically,
well-deserved suspicion
Alas! This fear
is tearing us all apart
A self-made cocoon
the only remaining safeguard
Commercialism
seeping into the core
of life itself
Dependency for everything
followed by –
what to eat and where to go,
how to live, and even so
we follow blindly
A mindless flock
herded by politicians
or by religious leaders
Because it’s all about blind faith,
following a cult
so we can avoid being labelled dolts
This can go on forever
but leaves just one question –
Where are we going to end up
thanks to this mayhem?

  • Leena Prasad

Expectations

The eleven alphabet word itself is capable of destroying so many lives. Literally, this is the word for the strong belief that things will happen the way you expect them to. And we people are very prone to this problem. Yes, I meant it when I said it, it IS a problem –  the biggest problem. I say this because I’ve seen too many different kinds of relationships die or suffer because of expectations. Having expectations changes our perspective of others. We add all our wants to them, and in turn, feelings are sidetracked. Having expectations adds an ‘If’ very silently. ‘If’ someone does things the way you expect them to, your friendship or relationship can thrive. Things become almost mechanical this way. I believe that if we have feelings for someone, we shouldn’t ‘expect’ anything but happiness for, and from, that person. No, this is not too idealistic or farfetched. All you have to do is simply stop expecting others to follow your rules, and try to respect them as the individuals they are. Think about this more clearly, and take an example. Parents often have expectations regarding how their children should stand first in class, or even about how they should take science, and then go on to become only either a doctor or an engineer. WHY? If you expect to find a rose flower on a jasmine plant, you will be disappointed. Each individual is different, so let everybody grow in their own way and enjoy the beauty of life. In another instance, when a girl gets married, she is expected to be perfect by everyone. Funnily enough, you can’t even blame them, because it’s not solely their fault that our society still lives in medieval ways. Are you familiar with the following shloka?
Karyeshu dasi, Karaneshu manthri;
Bhojeshu mata, Shayaneshu rambha;
Kshamayeshu dharithri, Roopeshu lakshmi;
Satkarma yukta, Kuladharma pathni.
How can you expect one person to be this perfect? It’s not normal. Similarly, we see employees pressured by the expectations of their bosses, sportspersons from whom everybody expects only victory and nothing else,  etc., etc. The point I’m trying to make here is just that we shouldn’t crowd others with our expectations, because each one of us has our limitations, and attempting to fulfil every single one of others’ expectations leads to nothing but stress. If you must, have expectations for yourself, and demand improvement of yourself. Otherwise, expectations just burden and dampen our spirit.  Feel blessed if someone cares for you, and replace emotions with expectations. We can make a difference this way, and maybe even grow a little with each passing day. Just make sure that the expectations you have for your own growth aren’t too extreme, and avoid stress for a refreshing life. Everyone is beautiful in their own way, just like every single flower is beautiful despite having different appearances. On a familiar tangent, learn from nature, and understand that everything happens in its time. I love Gulmohar trees in full bloom, and still eagerly await every spring, looking forward to enjoying the flaming red blossoms. Live and let live.
Peace and love to all.

  • Leena Prasad 🙂

Memories

There are people in your lives
who claw out your memories
from within your bleeding hearts
and twist them, and turn them
into something distorted
that reeks of their venom
Reminiscing becomes nebulous 
and every memory, good and bad
gets muddled into a jagged bunch
pricking and prodding, until you fall
down, and farther down, underground.
                           – Leena Prasad 🙂 

Can’t we be what we are? I wonder, because I’m sure being yourself is much easier than pretending to be what others expect you to be. Maybe, being yourself is not always rewarding. It could be that you won’t be loved by everyone. You might not have all that many friends. However, whoever stays with you regardless, is definitely someone who truly cares for you, and will always be there for you. Each of us are connected in one way or another, but we hardly care for this. Maybe, the reason for this is that most of us are too busy pretending, to bother with such trivialities. One can say we are least interested in knowing each other as humans. Instead, our worldly roles take importance. We see people as and how they are related to us. For example, take your mother. For some kids, It’s quite tough to relate her to the mischievous school girl she once had been, who may have broken rules in her time, and had fun without a care in the world. Humans are allowed to live life on their own terms, while at the same time doing there jobs or taking up responsibility for their relationships. The reason that it’s tough to accept is probably our expectations. We all have the tendency to have fixed and set expectations from everyone around us. It’s the same in the case of parents. They often want their children to behave the way they expect them to. However, as a parent, it’s their job to help them identify the fine line between good and bad, right and wrong. They help them learn morals and can show them the right path, but it’s up to the children alone to choose to take it. So, help them grow. Because, just like flowers in a field, humans are also different, each with their own differences, but each beautiful nonetheless. If we all of us start respecting each other’s individuality and enjoy our lives together, we’ll learn so much! After all, a field of flowers holds a lot more beauty than a single flower on its own. 🙂 😉

  • Leena Prasad 🙂

28th January ❤

A day spent well..

Having you both around me
our felicitous conversations
in the ocean-scented breeze
The waves, and the birds and
the distant planes and ‘copters
in the late evening-colored sky
Mellifluous sounds around me
The feeling of blissful dreaming
as though I’m being showed
all my blessings on this Earth
Savoring them, grinning ear to ear
knowing that I’ll cherish it forever…

– Leena Prasad 🙂

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If only..

There are as many
different kinds of people
as there are different kinds
of loneliness….

Fighting and dreading,
complaining, not complaining,
sometimes masked with smiles,
with loud music, or makeup.

Running away from the facts
or even from people themselves,
but mostly from their own selves.
The way out is always dark…

Where silence is more vocal
than spoken words ever were.
Where the rain is like a lover, and
the moon, a close friend.

There’s a tendency to build
a wall around the fragile heart
and keep out everything, and everyone.
A sanctuary impossible to breach…

…Oh, if only someone knew enough to not try to break this wall down.
All you have to do is knock…

– Leena Prasad 🙂

Prison

We are all carrying

our prisons within us

Trapped inside walls

filled with memories

old scars, and regrets

and eventually,

we become at home

Punishing ourselves

wasting away our

precious years of life

just letting them go by

Inside our hearts.

we’re all waiting

for that little hope

that speck of sunlight

to escape, and to

reclaim that lost time